April 1, 2019

He Loved the Junk Parts

A couple was having marital trouble. They ran a business together and had two children. The woman, however, was very critical of her husband, as well as her children. Apparently, she had grown up in a home where her father was very critical of her, leading to the lasting and stinging impression that she could never measure up to his expectations.

Marriage counseling revealed an inner turmoil from knowing she could not achieve perfection in how she lived her life but trying to maintain the façade that she had. Trying to overcome that scared her, because removing the façade meant removing God from her life. She equated God with the reason for her need to be perfect, saying, “to think of God as a father and me as his daughter is totally suffocating.”

Her friend advised Eucharistic Adoration, once a week, for an hour each time. He told her to hold nothing back, relax and just bring all her feelings, frustrations and anxieties to Him. It was very hard, but after only a few weeks, she reported back to him, that:

“one night I experienced for the first time in my entire life the feeling of being washed with unconditional love from God the Father. You know what a big deal that is. I was a total wreck … but here’s the million dollar insight I got—I can only love myself when I know I’m loved like that by somebody who knows me through and through and not just the fake me that was most of my life … God noticed everything inside of me. All the [blank] especially. But here’s the new part: that’s what he loved. The [blank]! Not just the “perfect” parts of me which were the only parts I ever felt were lovable. Excuse my French, but that’s just [blank]ing wild…

Show Me the Father


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