March 22, 2019

I Felt It

After my conversion experience (which happened during the first Mass I attended), I visited many churches in an effort to bargain with God (‘OK, I’ll be a Christian, but do I have to be a Catholic?’) … I received Commmunion at that first Mass, and was flooded with joy, peace, and, most of all, a Real Presence I knew could only be Christ. I knew nothing at all of Catholic theology at that point; it wasn’t that I ‘believed’ in the Real Presence–I felt it. During the month or two when I went to other churches, I received communion. I remember crying once afterward, because I didn’t feel that Presence, and I was afraid it had been a one-time phenomenon. Then one day, when the roads were icy, I stopped in at the Cathedral for the 12:10 Mass. There were perhaps a dozen people in the vast nave, mostly elderly. I didn’t know how to follow the Mass, so I just stayed in a corner and knelt all the way through it. The priest was not particularly inspiring–he rushed through the liturgy in a monotone. The church (at that time) was hideous –gloomy and in poor condition, with ugly green carpet and a loudly clanking furnace. Yet HE was there! Once again, I wept in joy and recognition.”

– a personal account submitted by “Terrye”



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